hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
and you said cock pushups were impossible
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
