so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize