return my video game
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Randomize
