yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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