Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I had to cum in my sink.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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