Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
i think im in europe. pls send help
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
