we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I think I sprained my soul last night
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
