Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
