I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
