i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
