i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
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