You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
We talked him into tasing himself.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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