we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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