Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
You are a genius and a whore.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
