Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
