What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
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He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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