I heard we made out
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
PS: I just woke up from my shower
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
PANTIES FOUND
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
