do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
