We're facebook friends in real life
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
