hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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