Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
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I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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