haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
