You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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