I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
