He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize