I just made out with a guy for $7.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize