My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
