Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Everything about him screamed your future.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Randomize
