Dual....:-)
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Randomize
