I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
