Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
