So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Just puked most of my soul out..
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
