Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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