if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I just want nice things and good sex
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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