Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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