Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
