Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
