How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I didn't notice because vodka
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
