Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I have aggressive nipples.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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