East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
