Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
