Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
