Can i not drive my cunt home
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
