Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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