he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
false alarm. still invincible.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
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