i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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