I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
