I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
