My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
