Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
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