tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.