Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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